I've been dreading this new years. I haven't wanted to think about it, acknowledge it, or plan for it. I don't want to celebrate the start new year without my baby boy.
This time last year, as far as I knew, Cassidy was totally fine. He had a small bump on his head and an appointment to get it checked on the 4th. It turned out to be a surprise mast cell tumor, a major surgery that took half his ear, and supposedly the end of his cancer journey. Whether or not the lymphoma did in fact spread from there despite what the tests showed, or if it developed on its own simultaneously/right after, I'll never know.
What I do know is that this time last year, I was happy. Most things made sense. 2019 turned out to be my worst year by far, but I didn't want it to end because it was my last year with my sweet small boy.
This picture was taken on NYE two years ago, the last one we spent together in the same place.